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The Funnybone Quiz
How is your sense of humour? To figure out your FQ (Funnybone Quotient) please answer the questions in this article honestly.

How is your sense of humour? To figure out your FQ (Funnybone Quotient) please answer the following questions honestly. First of all, do you promise to tell the truth, the whole truth or at least a close proximity to the truth? If so, let's get started.

1. Which of the following statements best describes you:

a. I believe laughter should be used for medicinal purposes only.
b. When I hear others laughing I want to put fiberglass insulation in their pajamas.
c. When I hear laughter I want to know what's causing it and I will find a way to join in.

2. You slip and fall on an icy sidewalk. You:

a. Use words you didn't learn in church or Sunday school.
b. Sue the city, its employees, the employees' relatives and anyone who might have seen you wipe out.
c. Tell the three teenage girls who are laughing at you that you meant to fall; that it felt good, that it's part of your exercise program; that you're thinking of doing it again.

3. The people I spend most of my time with:

a. Appreciate a good round of gossip It's what we do best.
b. Make me really, really angry.
c. Make me laugh a lot.

4. A driver's impatient horn blast startles you while you are in the middle of a crosswalk? You:

a. Communicate with him in hand signals.
b. Kick his bumper and dent his grill.
c. Fake a heart attack and collapse in front of his car.

5. You just ran across a crowded restaurant to hug an old friend, only to discover he wasn't your old friend. You:

a. Dash to the washroom and cry your eyes out.
b. Insist that you are an old friend, that they've forgotten, that they’re probably senile.
c. Say, "I was just kidding. Now, may I take your order?"

6. You are finally seated in the same restaurant when the waiter accidentally pours water on your lap. You will:

a. Demand to see the manager.
b. Pelt the waiter with ketchup and sugar packages.
c. Do your best to laugh.

7. During an average day, I have been known to laugh out loud...

a. Who me? I have not laughed since 1973.
b. Only when other people slip, fall, or smack their heads.
c. Several times. I probably need professional help.

8. Your flight has been delayed 2 hours. You:

a. Fuss, fume, gripe, moan, mutter and bellyache. With a side order of carp, grouse, stew, beef, and whine.
b. Let everyone at the gate know how unimpressed you are.
c. Won't be thrilled, but what can I do? You'll call a friend in the area, read a good book or spread some cheer. Looks like these people could use it.

9. When people look at the way I live my life they are learning...

a. That the world is a dreadful place and I can't wait to get out of here.
b. That the fruit of the Spirit is frown, scowl, grimace, glower, sulk and wince.
c. That the joy of the Lord is my strength. That those who laugh lots grow old with all their wrinkles in the right places.

How to score: a = 0 b = 0 c = 3

0-3     We regret to inform you that you are humour-impaired and possibly suffer from severe laughter malnutrition or Late Onset Joy Deprivation (LOJD). Unless you memorize the book of Philippians and buy all of Phil's books you are in danger of needing a funny bone transplant.

6-15   You are definitely in recovery but may have a staff infection.

18-24  Congratulations! You are above normal. You benefit from a great attitude, and you're a blessing to others. Keep it up.

27       You suffer from Chronic Ha Ha Syndrome and are in danger of irritating others in the nursing home one day. We would suggest carrying lima beans with you and when you feel a laugh coming on, stuff them in your nose.

Phil Callaway is the author of It's Always Darkest Before the Fridge Door Opens (Bethany House). Visit him at Phil Callaway is the editor of Servant magazine, author of a dozen books and a popular speaker. His web site is:

Originally published in City Light News, March 2007.




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